Is Your Marriage Mediocre? 7 Ways To Reignite The Spark

Author Explores New Age Marriage Solutions

Are you just “surviving” in your marriage? Do you dread when your husband or wife returns home from work? Are trying to keep it together for the kids? Did your enormous expectations of marriage…FAIL?
A  study shows as many as 65 per cent of marriages end in divorce – because couples found wedded life just mediocre.

Pamela Haag’s book Marriage Confidential: The Post-Romantic Age of Workhorse Wives, Royal Children, Undersexed Spouses, & Rebel Couples, examines controversial New Age ways couples are coping with lulls.

The author polled almost 2,000 people for the study, and even openly created online dating identities and personal ads with her husband for the book.

These low-conflict but semi-happy marriages, rather than high-conflict ones, account for the majority of divorces each year. On the other hand, I found that since we don’t have to be married anymore, some people are ambitious for marriage and are less likely to stick it through a semi-happy marriage.’

Haag says U.S. has turned into a nation of ‘divorced cohabitators,’ ‘affair tolerators,’ ‘new monogamists,’ and ‘workhorse wives,’ to name a few.

She also says that 65 per cent of wives and more than 85 per cent of husbands would have affairs if they knew they wouldn’t be caught, and investigates how entertaining an open marriage can help some.

When we do get married, social media puts new stresses on monogamy – it’s easy to sign on to an online flirtation on Facebook or through email, and you can even use an online affair-finding site to find people to cheat with.
‘Finally, if we do slip into infidelity, we could have what I call an “Avatar affair” where the “lovers” communicate online, but might never meet. It’s all smoke, no mirrors.’

7 Ideas To Try To Create The Marriage You Want

  • Explore an open marriage, in which partners agree on the rules of having outside attachments
  • Downsize an expensive lifestyle for one that allows more time and freedom
  • Change parenting philosophies
  • Consider separate bedrooms
  • Try a “marriage sabbatical”, spending time apart to reconcile stability
  • Update and rewrite vows to reflect reality
  • Consider divorced cohabitation

The traditional marriage unit is dwindling down and people are starting to create their own interpretations of the sacred commitment. I’m not saying I agree 100% with her ideas, but I can see the truth in several of her points. I think that people need to start working on what’s right for them. As they say…if you like it, I love it.

Enough said.

Do you agree with this author in her tips to save lackluster marriages?

Related Posts with Thumbnails