How Do You Know When You’re Ready to Mingle after Divorce?

Divorce is the last case scenario when it comes to bad relationships. Some couples just can’t get pass financial struggles, infidelity (one of the leading causes for divorce) or communication issues. Nowadays, the majority of first-time marriages end within the first five years and the younger you are when you get married the likelihood of divorce increases.

After a break-up, you’re often left wondering how you’re going to pick up the pieces. How do you move on after you’ve been physically and spiritually intimate with someone for a portion of your life, have invested your time into one another and possibly have a family with? It may be challenging at first, but you can do it. You may wonder if you’ll ever find another love like the one you had, but you’ll never know that unless you try. However, keep in mind that divorce is rough and you shouldn’t rush into anything new until you’ve completely gotten over it legally and emotionally.

According to Elizabeth DenHam, of the Huffington Post, there are a number of ways to tell if you’re prematurely dating after a divorce. The most obvious one being that if you’re still legally married then you’re not ready to date. After 15 years of marriage, it’s understandable if your divorce proceedings are long and drawn out because there’s probably tons of stuff to sort out. It’s important that you take the appropriate amount of time to work out custody and assets but don’t fill the gaps between court dates with romantic ones. “If you are in the midst of divorce hell, which is not attractive to anyone,  it’s not fair to expect someone else to shoulder that burden with you. Wait until you are really free”.

Here are a few more signs that you’re not ready to date after divorce.

If you still feel married

-If you haven’t been divorced for at least a year

-You’re still angry

It’s great to be single and ready to mingle but make sure that you’re completely free from old ties before you get back out there. Other than necessary contact such as for a child or children’s sake, wash your hands of the past relationship so that you’ll be free to start a new one.

For more relationship advice, purchase my new book, “Am I in a Bad Relationship?”

Dr. O



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