Till “Debt” Do Us Part (Money & Relationships)

Couples Fighting Over Money

Should you open a joint account?

Should you cancel your “secret” credit card?

Should youcall  spouse/lover before or AFTER you make that major purchase?

No doubt, when we meet our soulmate, during the first flush of romance, most of us don’t go through the whole “what kind of money do you make” routine. But 6 months down the road, when the first mortgage bill comes in the mail…HERE COMES THE DRAMA.

A recent survey was conducted on various groups of people in different classes (low-income, general population, and affluent) to see how money affected the status and progress of their relationships. As a result, most of the affluent participants were less stressed about sharing their monthly expenses, sharing bank accounts and overall honesty about their income. On the flip side, many low-income participants kept separate accounts, had a “plan B” credit card, or often fought about whose share of the bill would be paid by who. Many of us would agree that it’s quite difficult to ask someone’s permission before making a desirable purchase. Marriage is work; it’s definitely a give-and-take matter of compromise and tolerance, which includes your bank accounts. About 75 percent of couples, married and unmarried, get into arguments over household finances, income and purchases. In the case you may find you or your spouse in this sort of trouble, try these things:

  • Go together. Even if it’s to the grocery store, GO TOGETHER. You learn to look for deals together and produce a productively unified mindset on shopping.
  • Ask permission. The average couple’s “ask him/her price” is $300.00, and even if the purchase is in the $100-$200 range…STILL ASK.
  • Be in the know. If you marry someone with crazy debt, their debt becomes your debt. If you won’t live with that, let them go.
  • Make slow adjustments, especially if you are a fresh couple. Learning to share bank accounts and financial information after being self-supportive for so long takes time and can be QUITE difficult.

Remember that greater than 50% of marriages end because of financial issues. It maybe prudent to take a course and learn excatly how “Money Works”  before you get married.  Even if you decide to stay single, all of us could benefit from a little learning in this area.

Has this post been helpful? Do you think that most couples who get together and understand money are less stressed than those who don’t?  Have you had a stewardship course just yet? Is your marriage financially in trouble?

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