Imagine that you’ve finally found your one true love, your other half, the person that fully completes you. He makes you laugh. She doesn’t mind your stubbornness and the both you have a mutual taste-bud for pickled flavored chips. Your kids adore him, your sister wants to adopt her and your parents have no objections what so ever. Sounds pretty sweet right? Now imagine that you’re 60 years old when cupid finally decides to strike you for good this time. It’s not the most conventional journey to love but nevertheless, it does happen. It’s hard to picture people our grandparent’s ages, giving each other googly eyes, but for some people love arrives or reoccurs later than intended.
According to Match.com, information on “late- in- life” marriages is hard to come by but they are still on the rise. The “data from a recent SIPP report (i.e., the federal Survey of Income and Program Participation) also shows 13% of those who wed in 2003 were age 45 and older”. Dr. Stephen Treat, CEO and Director of the Council for Relationships in Philadelphia, says the topic of late-in-life love comes up a lot in his practice. “I’ve talked to many, many couples about this,” he says. “I even had a 90-year-old who came to me and said, ‘I’ve never been married before and I want to get married.’” She had fallen head over heels for a guy 11 years her senior.
Although there are some obstacles to overcome for “late-in-life” love or any age love for that matter, one advantage of slowly running the race is knowing what you want and not wasting a lot of time to get it. While we would never advise anyone to rush down the alter, if you’ve been over the hill a few times, you may not be interested in having a grand affair to celebrate your love. That means no engagement dinner, bachelor party or one last night of freedom so to speak. All you want is the man/woman you’ve been waiting for all this time. On the contrary, if you’re one those “go big or go home” types, there’s no better time or way to prove all your doubters wrong then to throw the biggest wedding party you can afford.
We here at AskDrO advise you to never give up on love, however, we want you to be realistic about the other factors that accompany “late-in-life” love. If you’re age 50 and above, you will most likely have grown children who may also have children. You could be involved with a widow/widower who may still feel a sense of loyalty to their deceased partner. You maybe caring for an elderly parent or have health issues of your own, and if you’re serious about finally taking the plunge, you must be open to blending families if you or your new love have children that are not out the house yet.
It may be completely cliche, but never give up on love. Even if it takes you a few go’rounds to get it right, none of that will matter when it finally feels right to you.