Surviving the Aftermath of Love

It’s been just over a month since you’ve broken up with your boyfriend of three years. You’ve been dreading this day for two weeks because he always went all out with flowers, chocolates, and gifts for you. Now you have to endure being the only cubical in your department without pink and red oozing from every corner. Although today is formally known as Valentine’s Day, many of you may relate more to the title of National Singles Awareness Day.  While others are out gallivanting around with their lovers, you may be painfully reminded that that used to be you.

Break-ups are hard no matter when they occur, but suffering a recent break-up just before the National Day of Love could seem unbearable for most people.  I know it’s tough, but try not to be so down on yourself. Instead, appreciate the fact that you made a mature decision about your life that will benefit you in the long run. Valentine’s Day is just one day out the year, and you can certainly survive 24 hours without a love interest.

If you’ve suffered a recent break-up, here are some tips to help you get back on your feet.

1. Promise yourself that things will get better soon.

2. Self-heal (without the use of drugs, sex, or alcohol) by doing things such as attending a service at a place of worship or meditating at home.

3. Engage in physical exercise such as tennis, jogging, biking, swimming, weightlifting, etc, which will release chemicals in your brain to reduce your stress and depression.

Don’t let a bunch of tacky gifts and candy or family and friends, make you regret the choice you’ve made. No matter how much they’ve pushed for the two of you to stay together, the relationship was between you and him, not the two of you and them. You knew what was wrong in the relationship, and even though you loved him, you knew that it wasn’t right for you.

So, get up and brush yourself off. Don’t sit at home if you don’t want to just because you don’t have a valentine. Go out with friends, go to a party or just go and pamper yourself. Then maybe next year you’ll be able to join in on the love parade like everyone else.

For more relationship advice, purchase my new book, “Am I in a Bad Relationship?”

-Dr. O

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