I was thinking about this the other day and decided to share my feeling s with my readers on the subject. I’m curious to know why the public believe gays and lesbians should have homosexual orientation welcoming parties aka “coming out” sessions.   I’m sure many of you probably caught NBA star Jason Collin’s interview with Oprah the other night and this got me thinking about the whole “coming out” ordeal. There’s no requirement or law that says you have to announce your sexuality, so why do homosexuals, feel the need to showcase it? It’s one thing to come out to your family and friends, but why the whole TV special and promotions like many celebrities chose to do once they decide to officially tell the world that they are attracted to the same sex. What is even more important, is that most of us are no longer really interested in whose doing what and why.

I always find it interesting that in the public eye, sexuality is counted as “need-to-know” information. If they suspect that you’re less than straight, rumors are immediately developed about you whether you confirm their suspicions or not. If you’re gay, then fine, be gay, but why the whole charade of coming out? If you’re truly not trying to hide anything, there wouldn’t be the need to come out in the first place. You’d be upfront about it and let people make their own decisions about it.

Take Jason Collins for example. In his interview with Oprah, he said that he’s known he’s been gay since he hit puberty. Yet, he was in a relationship with a woman for eight years, who he was engaged to marry and played in the NBA for years. Now if you’ve known that you were attracted to the same sex since twelve or thirteen, why would you keep it silent for soooooo long? Yes, I understand that many are ashamed to be gay, and fear being judged but in my opinion, withholding information like this is selfish. That poor girl Collins was engaged to never suspected that he was gay and he strung her along for EIGHT YEARS (I seriously doubt that there was NOTHING that threw up a flag about his “lack of interest” in her over an 8 year span though)! He never wanted her in the first place and it was wrong of him to do that to her. Now she’s going to need some intense therapy to help her get over him and the years she spent in the illusion. My former pastor once stated, “If you like fish you like fish and if you like beef you simply like beef.” When Pastor Nathan Simmons said that my mouth dropped. However, he was ever so very true.

The behind-the-scenes sports world involves a lot of close contact, and I just feel like maybe something of this nature should have been shared with his close, fellow team members, if there was a need.  I am not sure how the other players will adjust. Collins could have made his team aware of his life-style without a coming out party. People don’t need exclusive interviews, be invited to march in the Gay Pride Parade or asked to campaign for same -sex marriages in order to tell people they’re gay. When the situation arises just simply say “I’m gay” and be done with it. Do you think  he kept quiet so long out of fear of getting fired? I believe Mr. Collins may be close to retirement, could that also be why he decided to do a tell all interview?

Now interestingly, no major Bishop or mainstream Black denomination has spoken out on this topic/event (Oprah did bring up the “Black” church’s disapproval of homosexcuality in their interview). Hum, this maybe very interesting as to the whys or the why nots. Is it because a lot of our church leaders are warring with should they or should they NOT “come-out.” That was a tough one to swallow. However, there are many testimonies from both girls and boys about what Pastor, Evangelist, Revivalist or Missionary turned-them-out. I am in no way bashing, this is just a point to ponder. Where is the church now. DEAD SILENT!

There are no special reports for people stating that they’re “straight” so why all the fuss over coming out? Is it some sort of unspoken protocol in Hollywood and Entertainment Industry?

Tell me your thoughts on the process of “coming out”.

Dr. O

Picture source: http://socalsocialclub.com/profiles/blogs/national-coming-out-day-not-just-for-newbies