Dedicated to Arnold and Sam
One source of depression in children is the loss of a parent before the age of eleven. When a child’s parent(s) are absent, this can lead to primitive rage. After this, anger can become turned inward (anger-turned-inward) against the self. In some cases, this becomes the etiology for depression. This is a very difficult type of depression to treat. Anger-Turned-Inward (against self) Depression can be resistant to both therapy and medications.
Now we have several categories of fathers:
1) Those that are sperm donors only.
2) Those that are active and participating in the lives of their children.
3) Those that don’t know that they are fathers.*
4) Those that choose to be surrogate fathers.
The focus of this BLOG will be on category #3.
I have spoken to several children who do not know the identity of their fathers. Although I was raised by a single parent-mother, I’ve always known my father. He was not really available for most of my formative years, but his occasional drive-bys did me well. The relationship, good or bad, between a father and their child is important. I can not understand why a mother would not reveal the identity of her child’s father to them. Here is the thing, can a mother be so angry with the child’s father, that she will not reveal his identity to the child? The other alternative would be embarrassment because she really does not know the father. Yes, this still happens and is possible in the 21st century.
Mother’s your children need to know who their father is for psychological, social, and biological reasons. If the father chooses not to connect, this is wrong but at least give him the option. There can be genetic diseases from both parental lines and lack of information can be deadly in the case of genetic disease or illness. If there is a question of who the father is, don’t forget about the new gold standard of Paternity Testing.
Paternity testing is not a bad idea and this is why;
-it is genetic fingerprinting to validate fatherhood
-it is scientific
-it is the most reliable type of test to validate
-0% indicates that the man is not the parent
-99.9% positive that a man is the parent
This father’s day one call to action should be for you (mothers) to be sure that your child(or children) know who their biological father is this year. Do not be embarrassed or hesistant, but do this for your child. This article was written at the request of several young men who really want to know their fathers this Father’s Day. I hope that they can somehow get their mothers to read this BLOG post.
If you are possibly depressed because of this issue, go to://www.drowensmd.com/index.php?option=com_php&Itemid=7