We look at winter as a season for finding companionship, staying indoors and snuggling up with one another. Of course, we don’t want to stay outdoors in the cold, club-hopping or speed-dating (do they even do that anymore???). For many of us who do find love in the winter and stay in, sometimes what was supposed to happen for a season usually ends up developing over two seasons….then three….then four…and soon, we find ourselves saying the 3 magic words that usually launches us into euphoria, or plummets us into despair: I LOVE YOU. So let’s say you go out, meet someone, develop chemistry, and over the course of 4-5 months, you find yourself accidentally slipped the four-letter “L” word every once in a while, and NOW you and your mate are discussing moving in together and becoming more serious. Perhaps this is potentially a long-term relationship. Perhaps you are only fooling yourself. Whether the former or the latter, here are a few clues you can use to detect “premature infatuation”, otherwise known as falling in love WAY too fast.
- The “I feel like I’ve known you all my life” line: If it’s been under a year and they refer to this line about 70% of the time, for your sake, plan an escape route. Not only are they trying to convince you, but they have a warped sense of reality.
- The “no-fly zone” approach to meeting parents: No self-respecting mate in a relationship will turn down the opportunity to see where you get your dashing looks and sparkling personality from. If your lover plays games whenever you mention meeting your family, yet they’ve attempted proposing to you, you may want to think twice about continuing.
- “Mass” confessions: This is a tricky one; some will confess their love because they truly love you. Others will confess their love to the masses so that when you call your friends about “the one who went Mike Tyson on their ex-lover”, you end up looking like “The Boy Who Cried Wolf”.
- Strength in numbers: Most times, if your close friends and family are telling you the SAME EXACT THING, no matter how you feel, you may have to admit that they are right and choose accordingly.
- The “Deaf” Syndrome: If it seems like the ONLY decent communication occurs with “body language” (and you know what I mean), this is definitely a red-flag situation. Not only are you moving too fast, but you are mistaking real love with infatuation.
- Abacus: Let’s face it: most of us want our love to work, and we admire couples who have endured over LONG periods of time. But if in every conversation, your mate starts spewing out dates, dollar amounts, months, days, etc. in regards to your relationship, you in turn should calculate how many seconds it’ll take you to run away from that foolishness!
What are other suggestions or ways you can tell if a relationship is moving too fast? Share your thoughts on our blog!